Starting Fresh

As I sit down to write this blog, I am pondering the typical January 1st thought, "What will I resolve to do differently this year?" The number of things that come to mind are too numerous for me to list let alone comprehend today, so instead, this year, I vow to take a new tact. I recently read the difference between a vow and a promise and have to say that I realized that I have not really taken the power of a vow seriously. This year I vow to uphold my vows. This is a spiritual promise, not an "I swear to only put 1 tablespoon of creamer in my coffee instead of 5", kind of promise." This speaks to me in a different language completely. I vow with my spirit, to make a true effort to change habits that impede my growth as a human being. We all make the typical resolution of losing weight, working out, flossing or swearing off chocolate. I want this year, 2010, to be different. I want to infuse my life with hope. I want to see it everywhere, no matter the situation. I want to see the human spirit at it's best, uplifted, glorious and full of light. I want to see in others what I want to see in myself...joy. It is so easy to fall into the habit of feeling sorry for ourselves. "I have too much laundry, homework to check, toilets to clean.", we cry! The list goes on and on, but it doesn't change the fact that there is still laundry to do, homework to check or toilets to clean. It just makes you miserable in the process. What I have just described is, in fact, an adult temper tantrum. I have had them a lot lately and unfortunately, my husband has had to catch the brunt of them. I will even go so far as to say that I blamed him for them. For that I am eternally remorseful. So this New Years, I won't make the standard resolution, I'll make a series of resolutions all year long, perhaps even try to bring one a day to consciousness for the sake of growing in my spirit, to find the joy in my life again. It's still there, I've just been blinded by my own self centered ways. Today, I resolve to see others as I would like to be seen, as a divine spiritual being put on this earth/school to expand my consciousness and to truly get to know thyself. Only by doing that will I ever get to know the divine and in the end, I think that's the point. I am supposed to relate to God via me and if I don't know me, how will I ever know God? The good news for all of my yoga students is this, because what I am experiencing in life, usually comes out in class, you too will get the opportunity the delve deeply into uncharted waters, feel free to take the ride, or go it at your own pace, but the chance for spiritual upheaval is at hand if you're brave enough to take the challenge. And I use the word brave intentionally here. Change is never easy, but it is necessary for progress. You will find those around you who will argue your need to evolve, they will want you to stay the same, usually for them, because if you are doing something that they are participating in and you choose not to do it henceforth, where does that leave them? A person must be willing to leave behind the thing that is keeping them stagnant and it feels 'oh-so-comfortable' there, all warm and secure and familiar-fuzzy. But I am fairly certain that there is a feeling beyond description waiting for me on the other side of fear called freedom. I don't know about you, but I think I'll take my chances.